Archive for Cataclysm

Atramedes probably deserved it

The first time I saw Atramedes he was a little tiny whelpling. I don’t play with sound, so I likely missed a lot of the storyline behind it, but all of a sudden, the little guy gets zapped. For at least twenty minutes I couldn’t stop myself feeling sorry for the little guy. Oh ho ho! That little guy eventually becomes Atramedes, the blind ass dragon who is a giant pain in my ass.

Atramedes

Well, y’know what? Atramedes is a douche bag. Blind ass dragon is a pain in the damn ass dragon.

Don’t get me wrong, I realize that the majority of the dragons in WoW are douche bags. I mean, what’s the point of playing a game in which you don’t kill internet dragons?? Yeah, I can’t think of one either.

This one in particular, sends these really pretty sonic rings all around the room, originating from underneath his belly-ish area. The problem with the pretty rings is that I want to stand in them and see what happens? Don’t know what happens? He breathes fire on you. Not only does he breathe fire on you, but you get a hand debuff called death.

Throughout my WoW playing, I’ve always (generally speaking of course) been really good at avoiding all the junk on the ground. Purple circles, rocks falling, brown circles, white circles, blue circles, fire circles, fire patches… you name it, I probably stepped out of it*.

Unlike the horrible time I have staying out of Valiona’s face-eating purple fire of doom, I actually don’t do too badly avoiding Atramedes’ sonic rings of “omg I wanna stand in it” and, yes, of course the fire.

Y’know what I have a problem with? It seems it’s Searing Flame. Not even when it’s cast on me, but when it’s cast on others and I stand there like a dumb ass and don’t move to the left while they’re running right. Oh, no, why would I move when I can just hit 100 sounds and get devastated all over the place. It seems I do my best raiding with my face on the ground, honing in on my awesome skills of death buff. o.O My Raid Leader, however, might beg to differ about being really amazing dead on the floor.

With a monetary incentive, the RL offered 50 gold to the person who didn’t get hit with any of the pretty sonic rings, before 11:30 pm EST. We didn’t reach the time limit, cause, let’s face it, Atramedes was a hungry mutha-effer that night.

I’m fairly certain that by the end of the night Tuesday, everyone was pretty pissed off at Atramedes. I went from feeling really sorry for him to wanting him to die horribly and take his damn sonic discs with him. I keep telling myself that maybe he was just a mean bully of a whelpling and that’s why he was blinded, thus deserving what he got.

* This includes the good things, like Healing Rain, and Efflorescence the first time I’ve seen them. Don’t judge me.

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Things to not fail at

So, when your raid leader tells you that you’re a nubcake and need to stop standing in the fire and dying like said nubcake, what do you do? Try to be better about not dying to face-eating-fire and move, right?? Right.

Well, as an advocate of the Don’t Stand in the Effing Fire club, I need to hand over my card and start back over at the intro level courses. How am I supposed to be upset about someone standing in fire when I myself can’t seem to get the hell out of it?

See here’s the thing. Last week (and I’m actually referring to the 18th of January) of raids, we were in Bastion of Twilight. I was there. I was told to stop going into the Twilight realm and stop dying to easily avoidable face-eating-fire breath. I was doing better… that night. As a guild, we hadn’t been to Bastion of Twilight since that Tuesday, and it seems I immediately went back to my nubcake-old self and died, early on, to face-eating-fire.

I’m already not a huge fan of the dragon twins. They’re whores. I have now deemed them the whore dragon twins.

whore dragon twins

Whore dragon twins

Mind you, there are so many effing more things to dislike about different events. Like the Council stuff Apotheosis started on last night. Wanna talk about a clusterfuck of insanity?? It was trying to do Council last night. It was insane. The dead tanks, the aoe damage, the fire and the waterlogged, and running through fire to remove waterlogged, but not stand in fire. I think the first attempt took all of a few seconds. I said I was ready, but it seems I had no idea just how insane the whole thing would be.

Back to the face-eating-fire part. Don’t stand in it nubcake. Fire is bad for you. This isn’t even the kind of invisible fire that you can’t see. It’s damn purple for christ’s sake, and I still died to it. Part of my problem was not being a tree, I think. As a tree I’m much more resilient to not die to fire.* It’s like not actually being made of wood or something. And I’m purple with an ‘fro. Fire can’t touch the purple ‘fro, man!

Another things (on a more serious note) is that I forget to get away from her face to avoid face-eating-fire. It is such a habit to try to run left or right out of fire simply to get out of it as soon as possible, but really what I want is to high-tail it away from her face. To avoid face-eating-fire. Get it?? I’ve been told this, but practice makes perfect, and it had been awhile since I had practiced. Though truth be told, as often as I face-eat the fire, I don’t understand why the RL even bothers to take me along in the first place.

In the end, I did better about not going into the Twilight Realm, probably one of the only good things about that death buff you get for taking face-eating-fire to the face. There’s no way to screw that up.

Wanna know what the worst part is? When trying to do Council later, I was told “If you get the Waterlogged debuff, just run through the fire, don’t stand in it, just run through it, that way you don’t freeze when the next *whateverbadthingcomesnext* hits.” So I get waterlogged and guess what I do? Run through the fire and get waterlogged off. What happens when Valiona takes her sweet ass time turning to face a direction in which she’s going to breathe her face-eating-fire?

I sit around and wait. I needed that death buff something fierce.

Moral of the story?? Face the dragon that breathes face-eating-fire so that you can see which direction she’s turning before she breathes fire, so that you can gtfo.**

* I’m totally being sarcastic, btw, in case you can’t tell.
** Something, if I get invited along on raids anymore, I will have to be uber-diligent to be better about. Though at this point, if I were demoted to friend and not promoted to raider, I can’t really blame the RL. I fail at this fire so hard.

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Valiona & Theralion: Revisited

So after much frustration from Sunday night’s ridiculous failure of trying to down Valiona & Theralion, and my inability to stay the hell out of the Twilight Realm, we all came back on Tuesday with some pretty amazing attempts. So our fearless leader decided to change things up a little bit when we got there. This required some explanation because of the changes to how we were going to deal with the Blackout‘s that are being dished out.

Last week, the way we were attempting to deal with these two dragons requires two different marked guild members. One in melee and one ranged. When the blackout went out, if you were ranged you’d stack up on the ranged target, and if you were melee you did the same but staying near the dragon. The problem this was causing was that there weren’t enough bodies to distribute the damage, usually resulting in at least one death (and possibly more). One of the major problems with Bastion of Twilight is the ridiculous quantities of trash mobs that need to be dealt with. By ridiculous quantities of trash I mean so many mobs per group that you run out of raid markers and have to designate “left unmarked” and “right unmarked” or the “unmarked behind circle”, etc. Get the idea?? It’s ridiculous. The first time the guild went through there I was not around to see what “epic trash” actually was, so I had no idea what to expect. Sadly, when I get asked to do something like hibernate a dragonkin, I freeze.

“You want me to what?” Hibernate that mob. “What’s a hibernate??”

I’m kidding. I know what hibernate is, and have actually used it quite a bit during Grim Batol while grinding Heroics, but I hadn’t used it in awhile. It’s just not something I’m used to doing. Ever wonder what happens when your hibernate fails? The raid ends up with a dead druid, that’s what.

One of the problems we were having outside of people just being off their game* there simply weren’t enough melee to soak up the damage. For the first couple of attempts we lost a couple of melee dps. Some of the ranged were told to run up and help soak up some of the blackout damage, but by that point the loss of bodies meant that a wipe was called.

Now, I am not even going to lie about being one of the few people to consistently eat face to Devouring Flames like an effing nubcake. There are few excuses to taking so much damage (and luckily not dying, but that also meant my poor healer or I was spending time healing me when we should have been healing other people) and I knew this needed to be changed. The worst part is that the hooker Valiona actually turns to cast it, so I can see what direction she’s facing. Still I ate it. Mind you, I didn’t know you could just run away from her an take less damage. Apparently the closer you are to her the more damage you take. I didn’t know this, and so I kept trying to run around towards her backside in an attempt to get out of it. Sometimes dying, sometimes not. Either way, avoidable damage that I wasn’t being very effective at avoiding very well.

Something else to remember is that ranged is supposed to be so many yards away from each other. Okay. I can do this. I know I can do this. Except, I ran into melee for blackout and upon running back out again I stopped paying attention to the direction Valiona was facing. I was only paying attention to who was near me and making sure I was within range to heal, but away from people to avoid unnecessary damage. Then there’s my healing.

Ah, fak, Devouring flames to my face!

On Tuesday’s raid, we decided to all collapse on melee. This meant the priest(s) were able to drop lightwell’s near the center, within clicking range for everyone. This also meant that we had the entire platform to spread back out again. The difference between how things were on Sunday versus Tuesday is that all ranged went into melee, not just the ones who chose this time to run in. There weren’t areas of the platform already occupied by people upon the run-out phase. I didn’t spend precious seconds looking for a clear area of ground. We all moved out together. This also meant that we were able head towards her tail.

The guild had a few wipes, but overall I had a much better experience with how things went on Tuesday’s raids. I also felt that I wasn’t nearly as distracted and was able to concentrate on what was going on on the computer screen. Mind you, it’s often hard to give WoW my undivided attention while at home, no matter what room I’m in.**

All in all, I don’t hate the event nearly as much as I did on Sunday. It’s still not one of my favorites since the swirlies that suck you into the Twilight realm have a much bigger reach than their graphic shows (and I have all my graphics turned up). Or not knowing what the portal to get out of the Twilight realm looked like. Or the north, south and middle flames. Ugh, actually, on second thought, these dragons are hookers still.

I did get Drake of the Twins off them, so I can’t hate them too much.

* I was definitely one of those people. I even said so on the guild forums with an apology. I felt as though I were completely distracted nearly the entire night and should have asked to be swapped out with a healer that wasn’t so completely and utterly distracted. Although I was not the only one, according to guildie’s posts on the forums as well.

** I have started playing while in bed, there is another who pays in the same room and a 13-year-old running around the house somewhere. Usually asking fairly ridiculous questions and talking loudly causing me to not hear stuff going on in Mumble.

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Celiebugs’ Raid Tips

Sometimes the best raid tips come from a variety of places. And in this case, a variety of ages.

Celiebug breaks down the finer points of raiding in WoW.

brought to you by Osephala‘s amazing genetics and computer skills.

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Valiona & Theralion

I’m gonna go ahead and say it right from the start. This even sucks. It doesn’t just suck, it’s one of the most horrible raid encounters I’ve done in Cataclysm so far. Lemme tell you, there are some pretty horrible raid events that have a very large learning curve. None of them make me want to pull my hair out quite like this fight.

I’m unable to understand how I always get hit by the purple effing fire, but I always get hit. I don’t necessarily die, but I always get hit. It doesn’t matter where I stand, or how far away I am, I always get hit. That damn dragon has a thing against me, I know it. Tonight, after what felt like the one millionth attempt, they got those dragons down while I laid there dead

The worst part is how fail I look on the logs. I apparently like to eat fire… with my face and body, so I am almost always standing in front of the damn dragon when she breaths her purple flames of doom. I didn’t die last night, but I took an awful lot of unnecessary damage (like a damn noob). Then I get stuck in the Twilight realm where there are pink orbs of badness you’re supposed to avoid. Not to mention that while there, you’re taking constant damage. Oh yeah, did I mention that I had no idea what to look for to get the fuck outta that place?? yeah, no. I didn’t. So I wandered around, dodging pink orbs of badness looking for the right corner with my way out.

Admittedly, I seemed distracted. I posted on the forums that next time when I’m not feeling 100%, I’ll ask to be swapped out for a healer who is feeling much more on top of things. Maybe it’s the dynamics of the fight that were throwing me off. Maybe I wanted to log onto my finally-level-75 Inscriptionist and work on that so he could make Darkmoon cards. Maybe I was dreading going back to work. Whatever was bothering the crap out of me seemed to affect my performance.

As an advocate for Stay the Fuck Outta Fire, I sure set a bad example last night.

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Funny Thing About Blogging

There are truly thousands of blogs on thousands of topics that any one reader could find themselves overwhelmed and inundated with information. The writer, however, should feel passionate about what they’re writing about. I guess this is where I’ve failed as a writer over the last handful of years. I haven’t found much to be passionate about.

I did try my hand at helping my friend Henry out with writing at Azeroth Metblogs, but the limitations were frustrating to say the least. Then there were those topics that I felt were almost too personal for a group endeavor blog. I will still read what’s over there, and will contribute now and again, but the passion I have for World of Warcraft is kind of… ridiculous.

The story
The backstory is that I have been off work for about 2.5 months. I had an awful lot of time to play as much as I wanted, and the medication I was taking was wrecking havoc on my sleep schedule. As the time neared for Cataclysm to be released, I prepared myself for not sleeping for a few days. And over time I realized that I loved learning new stuff. That wiping again and again wasn’t *that* bad. Sure, it’s frustrsting. Yeah, it’s not that fun. I ended up one of few people who knew how to pull trash groups and deal with the various boss phases.

There were some bosses, though, that eluded me. Commander Springevale in Shadowfang Keep (SFK) spawned these adds and they debuffed us and buffed/healed him. After something close to 30 attempts total (over 3-4 different days/groups) it was always voted to skip him. Commande DoucheNoodle was just too much for up and coming toons with middle-ground gear.

Let’s not even mention how difficult it’s been to relearn my own toon. What’s this?? I can’t just put Rejuvenation on everyone and call it good?? I have to *gasp* use Healing Touch!! Lesson learned, Blizzard… Lesson fuckin’ learned.

And now…
There are so many blogs out there explaining how to do things in the game. The resources available for help are kind of ridiculous. Many people write about their own personal experiences in the game as well. Be it the trials and tribulations of being on a PvP server, or the nuances of raiding on a PvE server. Over the years I have become increasingly dependent on wowhead for tips and tricks on how to do damn near everything. Except, what happens when all of the content is brand new and there’s not much information available? Well first, I installed the wowhead addon so that all of my herbing/minding/archaeology/fishing nodes would be tracked and sent to their giant database. It’s not a lot, I know, but it’s the least I could do to try to help give back.

Second will be this blog. The warning that heroics and dungeons were going to be difficult didn’t fall on deaf ears, but lemme just say that I had no idea what to expect going into Cataclysm. I leveled to 85 in 3 days and ran dungeons almost non-stop for days. Begging people to craft items for me, wearing cloth because it was better than the leather I was wearing, needing on everything that might be an upgrade, even if it was minor.

It took me the better part of a week and a half to get heroic ready. Healing heroics is a rough endeavor. Especially when the majority of tanks that are queuing were bred from the WotLK days of “AoE everything” and “pull multiple groups at once, it’s okay”. Heroics truly required crowd control and dps to hold off for just a second. Mana goes a lot longer when you’re only focusing on healing one person, rather than spreading it out across all 5 (and up to 8 if they’re all pet classes). I haven’t even gotten to the part where I had to carry 100 waters to drink after every trash pull, and every boss pull. Where I’d have to use my own Innervate as well as beg the priest(s) for their Hymn hoping that it would be enough to get me through.

One day I decided, after having explained another heroic dungeon for the 100th time, that I wanted to write visual entries for the heroics. Explanations of where to stand, where to bomb, screen shots of the good fire and the bad fire. Not only that, but how best to pull trash to avoid deaths and wipes. Because let’s face it, there are some dungeons (*cough*Throne of Tides*cough*) where the group wiped more times on the trash pulls than we did on all of the bosses combined.

As frustration escalates because death after death people would have to teleport out for repairs, increasing the time spent in a single dungeon. after 2-3 hours, people are irritable and frustrated. All anyone wants at that point is to get through it, or call it, much to everyone’s dismay. Written directions are great and any person can find so many instructions on how to muster through the dungeons, but so few people actually  know what to look for. If your spell effects are turned down you might miss the good stuff you’re supposed to stand in. If it’s your first time and you’re terrified of being booted from a PUG group so you keep your vicious secret to yourself hoping to muscle through, I’m here to tell you it can’t be done. You’re better to ask how bosses work, and what the strategies (strats) are.

I’m here to help you. If nothing else you can pretend to know what to expect your first time through. And you’ll even know what to look for.

This, my friends, is my WoW endeavor.

We’ll see how long it lasts.

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